SALLY observed that we were the only Comp Science people there. Good, we did not have to think of computers for a while. The organiser of the tour was a second year Bizad student. She tried hard to get everybody together and mix around. Of course, the two of us clicked immediately and mixing with other people was not important at all.

As it was only about a month since Sally left me, I still felt dejected and lost then. I wanted someone to talk to and someone to listen to my troubles and worries. I poured out my heart to her and she listened well. Perhaps it was also because of the sudden relief from loneliness that I was feeling; I felt that I could talk to her like a good old friend. I told her about Sally, about Ken, about how my studies suffered and about my army days.

She was an interested listener. She was very patient and quite cultured too I think. Her actions were refined. The way she smiled, the way she drank her cola, the way she walked, the way she laughed, the way she talked, the way she looked at me, the way she brushed her hair; they all spoke of someone with good etiquette and charged with feminism. Her voice was clear and interesting. I just love watching her and listening to her.

Like two lovers on honeymoon, we were oblivious to the outside world. We only talked to ourselves and 'took care' of our own selves. It was like a small world of our own; sitting on the coach and travelling from place to place.

Each time the coach stopped, we would be the last one to alight. Each time we left a place, we would be among the first to get up the coach to take the back seats. We had more privacy that way.

One of the places we visited was a discotheque. It was there that I discovered that she was a good dancer. It was also there that I discovered that she came from rich family; she frequented high class eating and leisure places quite often with another of her 'high' society girlfriend. She told of me of how guys at those places always wanted to know them and tried dating them too. Her girlfriend was quite game and even went out with some of them. She was a bit more conservative she said. She only went out with an engineer who was six years her senior to the pub, or so she said.

The second last place we visited was the fish market. As early as three a.m., people already started selling and buying fresh vegetables, meat and fish there. We were led to a floating walkway across the warehouse because the whole place can be observed from there.

The floating walkway was high and slippery. When the 'guide' stopped at the middle of it to explain to us the various functioning of the place, Sally held onto my elbow as if she was afraid of heights. I seized the chance too to hold her hands and lead her all the way until we went back to the coach.

The feeling was different. With Lisa there was always a fear to be seen by her cousin and her friends. But with Sally, things were quite the opposite. We ignored other undergrads who said we were 'fast'. Who cares!

The last place visited was Mount Faber. Some of the people were sleeping, some were talking, but most were buaya-ing I suppose. We walked to a quiet place away from the rest and settled down onto a lookout bench on a slope. It was quite far from the rest of the group. None of them could see or hear us, but we could see and hear them.

Sally sat down beside me and we started talking about our childhood days. She told me about how tomboyish she was; I told her about how girlie I was too. She even told me of how once she urinated into her flower pot when she learnt that urine can 'help' a plant to grow.

"Do you have any boyfriend before?" I asked.

She looked at me and said, "What do you think?"

"Well you certainly look good and I think you have a lot of suitors."

"Do I look that good? Anyway, there aren't many. Only a few." she replied. "Hey, tell me why did you break up with Lisa?"

I debated whether I should tell her the truth. Knowing that it was quite useless to keep the truth from her, I decided to tell her bits of it.

"I did not break up with her. She left me. She left me for her ex. That's why," I said curtly. I was a bit angry and a bit sad. "I just cannot comprehend why she left me so suddenly. I just could not bring her back."

"If she ever come back to you, will you still want her?"

I was not so sure myself. I stared out into the horizon. The blinking lights of the ships did not tell me any answer. Neither did the blinking stars above that littered heaven. I was confused about my own feelings towards Lisa. I was angry with her for changing and dumping me. But then I still loved her. I did not know the answer to the question Sally asked.

"I suppose she would not ask me back. I still like her. But I think if she ever come back to me, I might say 'yes'. It depends on when and why she comes back to me."

"If... say tomorrow?"

"I might."

"What if it's because her ex dumps her again?"

"Then I would not."

"But what if she found out she did not love him as much as she loves you?"

I was surprised at that question. I really hoped it is true. But will she? In her own words she said that she was falling in love with him again. Will she do the same for me? I did not think I can hold a candle to him at all. I 'lost' to him in many ways.

"Min, is the question too sensitive? You know you needn't have to answer."

"It's a case I never thought of before. I don't know."

I could senses that she was a bit disappointed. I could see in her eyes that she hoped that I would say I will never go back to Lisa. But then I did not want to lie to her. What else could I say?

The cold morning breeze made our casual wear defenseless against the coldness. Sally folded her arms and rubbed her own elbows. She did not want to look at me. Through the sunlight that was trying to break through the horizon, I could see a sparkle in her eye. My heart just melted. I could sense that she needed someone to hold her, to prop up her lost confidence and hope. I put my arms around her shoulder, trying to shield her away from the cold breeze. She was a bit surprised; she just moved closer to me and laid her head on my shoulder.

We were silent for about a few minutes. Both of us needed one another for warmth, both kinds of warmth.

"Min, I want to tell you I like you. You don't have to feel the same."

"I... I like you too. It's just that I still cannot forget Lisa. I mean I enjoy talking to you. I enjoy being with you. I like your company. I really hope we can be better friends and perhaps, special friends."

"Really?" her face lit up.

"Yes, I want to give us a try. Will you..."

She did not need words to communicate her answer and feelings. She turned around and gave me a 'side' hug with a quick peck on the cheek. I was elated. I felt so wonderful. Never has anyone kissed me so suddenly. I felt safe and secured too.

She semi-snuggled on the bench and rested her head on my lap. I looked at her contented look and was very happy. I played with her short hair and also fingered with her bracelet. We did not need any words to communicate feelings. Our touches were electrified and deliberated. Morning has just broken. A new day, a new chapter awaited us.

After our lessons were over, we would go to her place to spend the rest of the afternoon to study. Dinner at her place was solid. Her maid was good at Indian food. I really wondered how she kept her figure.

Sometimes we would go to a park or a good eating place. There were times when she would drive her father's car out to a reservoir and she would let me drive the car. My driving license saw some good use at last.

Her dad co-owned a chain of restaurants with her uncles. No wonder she is good with food. Whenever we went out, she never allowed me to pay for the bill. She always said that her Dad gave a lot of money and if she did not spend them, she would waste it on compact discs, clothes and jewelry. Because she said that, I felt much better.

One Saturday we went to her home as usual. I noticed that she was particularly happier than normal.

"Why are you so happy? Anything up?" I asked.

"A little pre-Christmas surprise for you. You will know later."

When we reached her place, she asked me to wait in her room. I noticed that her house was very quiet. I could only hear her pekinese barking at me in the next door.

"Well what's up?" I asked when she returned to her room.

She put down a tray of glasses and vodka and held up my hands and said softly, "My parents went to Indonesia for some business. They took my little sis along. My brother went for ICT. I gave the maid two days off in return for a promise not to breathe a word about everything. Such chance doesn't come easily. We can..."

"Wait...why vodka?" I interrupted.

"Vodka makes you feel higher." she breathed those words sexily.

Two of us were alone in a large house. She went over to her personal mini-hifi and repeat-played the theme from Dying Young. I smiled and poured the vodka for ourselves. We drank the crystal clear liquid and felt good and excited.

She walked towards me and put her arms around my shoulder. I responded and put mine around her waist. We moved in rhythm to the sentimental music. It felt so wonderful. The music was good. The partner was better. The drink was solid. The mood was fantastic.

I felt tipsy quite quickly and wanted to stop dancing. She seemed to keep quite a cool head. I moved my hands to the button of her jean skirt and unbutton it, dropping the skirt onto the floor. She stepped aside and unbuckle my belt, unbuttoning it at the same time. She was a smooth operator.

It wasn't long before there was nothing to take off. She led me to her queen-size bed. The music was still playing. We were still tipsy. Our mood was even higher and the heat was on...

Music was playing. Vodka was working. Passion was flying. And... everything else did not matter. Only ourselves.

I just could not forget that memorable weekend. We had the whole house to ourselves. We had lots of fun and tried many things we normally would not do. Sally also proved to be a great cook. She had planned it the week before when her parents told her they would be going away for a three-day business cum sightseeing trip to Indonesia. She was certainly cool. I like that.

One day while waiting for Sally, I decided to log onto VM in the IBM room to do my Cobol tutorial. I was doing halfway when I overheard,

"You mean the one who is going out with a guy from first year is it?"

"Ya lor. The one who was driving the car one."

"So what did you see?"

"I saw them at the Ship last Friday. She paid for the bill one you know?"

"Wah... so good one. I envy the guy man! He is living off her!"

"May be not lah. May be she was just returning him a treat."

"Aiyah! Whether true or not, if I am the guy I sure very happy one."

I was quite hurt at those comments. I slipped out of the room quietly and went home. I asked myself why did I have to suffer such criticism behind my back. Didn't they understand that she wanted to pay the bill herself? Surely I could afford to pay half of it but since she will waste the money anyway, why worry?

Sally called that night and she was quite furious that I did not wait for her. I gave a lame excuse and hung up. I tried hard to forget what I heard that day.

The next day I decided to apologise to Sally. I sent her an e-mail saying I was sorry. I was quite confused as whether to carry on the relationship. I also began to wonder whether I was 'living off' my girlfriend and whether I really love her or her money.

Quite absentmindedly I talked to Lisa although I did not know if she was logged on. To my surprise she replied quite quickly.

"I am fine. How are you?" she asked.

"Sad. Very sad."

"How come? I thought you are happy with your new girlfriend?"

"That's the problem. It's the relationship that's the problem."

"Tell you what.... wait for me at the usual Central place half an hour later, I will join you."

I sent a second e-mail to Sally and asked her to go back herself. I took the internal shuttle bus to Central to see Lisa. This time it's a different kind of feeling. A feeling that was quite opposite of the last time I went to Central to see her.

"So what's your problem?" she asked.

"People think I am 'living off' my new girl."

"How did you know that?"

"I overheard yesterday. What they said was quite true too."

"What do you mean living off?"

"I mean she paid for all our expenses. I volunteered but she wanted to. She is quite rich actually. I did not think of that until those remarks I heard yesterday woke me up."

"Well, if both of you are sincere then it's ok. Don't give up so easily."

"The problem is that I myself don't know if I really like her or the money she spent on us. Tell me, what would you do?"

"Actually I am not much better. Roger's friends seem to think that I am with him for his money. I felt hurt too but I didn't care. I love him and he loves me. That's all I care."

"That's because both of you are quite sure of yourselves. For me, I am not quite sure. Since you left me, I have not been able to love another person as fully as I should. I have really lost my ability to love again. I really feel bad."

I did not mean to say those words but they just blurted out. Lisa was visibly shocked. She looked at me with teary eyes and then looked down onto the table again.

I clasped her hands in mine and said sorry softly,

"You don't have to be sorry. I am the one who should say sorry. I was the one who gave you so much trouble."

She only realised this too late. She took my hands and kissed them. She was still so sweet, so gentle. Her eyes spoke volumes of sorrows and regret. I really wanted to tell her to come back to me. I still love her. More than Sally.

Just then, I heard footsteps coming towards me. I looked at and saw Sally heading towards our position. Lisa pushed my hands from her lips and withdrew them but Sally saw it all. Tears welled up in her eyes as she stood there staring in disbelief.

Through his eyes.